Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Unclogging the Pipeline

Background: for the past SEVERAL months (no need to define everything with time, right?) I was casually involved on and off with a certain male who is... let's say, emotionally unavailable.

Now, to his credit, he was totally up front and honest about this certain unavailability. I went through my own stages of dealing with it:

"Maybe he is just saying that, but really, deep down inside, he wants to be in a relationship with me"

"He clearly has been so hurt, that this is just his way of saying he wants me to save him"

Yes, I know. In the real world, we call this DENIAL. As a woman who has had her share of unsuccessful relationships, you'd think I'd approach this with a been there, done that attitude, but it was just not possible with this guy.

What could possibly keep me in such a dysfunctional relationship (if you could even call it a relationship?). Yep... SEX.

Wow. Great sex. This is not a blog about sex, but if it was, I would just go on and on at this point.

But it's not.

So, sadly, I won't.

This is about dating - or lack thereof.

So, one night, I was chatting with a friend who knew of my non-relationship and he just flat out said, "Your pipeline is clogged. You have a big fish in your pipeline and he is using up all your emotional capital".

Seriously? This guy was totally right. It's not rocket science that a wonderfully satisfying physical yet dysfunctional relationship with a totally uncommitted guy would distract you from finding love, but that's exactly what I was doing. I had clogged my own pipeline!

It was time to flush it all out and get things moving...




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